Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012! :)

This 2011, I had been expecting some things to happen. Base on my last post, about the guy I dreamed, I thought I would meet him this year, but he didn't. No guy gave me any rose or whatsoever. But at least, in 2011, I finally moved on from my crush since high school.

And from moving on from him, I also fell inlove to someone new. (only, this is a one-sided love) Am I even allowed to use the term love?? LOL. Ok, so let's say I have a new crush. From the first time I saw him, I knew that there was something special about this guy. We became groupmates for one time in our class, and since then I never got to talk to him again. But I would always notice him though. When the semester almost ended, surprisingly, I got to talk to him. What started with just a question, became the beginning of a great friendship. Along the way, I kind of liked him. And it's just not a simple like, but a like which sometimes, makes me smile a lot, laugh a lot and cry a lot.

Because I'm a jealous person, sometimes, I wanted to be mean to him and yes I really did. But I guess, there was really a truth to all my doubts. And worse, there was a big truth about the rumors, that he was courting this girl he met at his birthday, who wasn't even suppose to be there (she party crashed). On the night, after his birthday, our friendship started to go down, we don't talk much to each other anymore.

So, after 1 month, my best guy bud was in a relationship with the girl he met at his birthday (who party crashed). I was kind of sad, because he kept it all as a secret from me, which I think is very unfair because I felt he doesn't trust me when I am his friend. And most especially, I'm sad, because I am brokenhearted. I like him more than as a friend, and yet, he only likes me as a friend. I never told him about it though.

On the night they declared their relationship on a social website, I commented on it and congratulated them. A few minutes later, he messaged me and then after awhile, he asked me how I felt about them dating. I didn't answer it. Then he asked another question, about how I felt for him. I didn't answer again. Then he messaged me that he likes her and he values me "as a friend" and if I don't like things, they can change. Because of what he said, I responded and told him that I like him but he should stay with his girlfriend and be happy and should not break up with her just because of a friend. But he said, that he cares about me and likes me and values our friendship. Then we said our good nights and our conversation ended.

After that, we have not talked anymore, but it's okay. At least I know he cares about me and I'm happy with that, but I can never deny that I'm still jealous.

If he breaks up with her on 2012 because of a friend, well, I will be really happy :)

But if he stays with her, I just want to wish him happiness and joy. It may hurt, but at least, he's happy.

And that's how my 2011 ended.

I will be looking forward to 2012 and I will not be expecting for that rose dream of mine to come true.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!! :)

THE BEST DREAM I'VE EVER HAD ❤ ♥ ❤ ♥

December 8, 2010

Dear NeTbook,

In my dream, the story goes like this. There were mean girls fighting my friend, Cheska. At first, I did not do anything about it, because I was scared of them, because they were so mean to her. Then the scene was at Robinsons, and I hid near the escalator, then I felt sorry for her, and I really hated what they did to my friend, so I went to them and told them that they don’t have the right to do those things to my friend. I defended her. And the next thing that happened to me, they all became mad at me and instead of fighting my friend, they fought me. Because I had was hurt by what they did to me, I cried and sat on the floor with my back on the wall. I was wearing a wedding veil on my head suddenly. That was weird, because I knew I wore jeans and shirt. Then suddenly, I saw a man walking up to me carrying one red rose with a golden ribbon on it and I saw that there was something written on the golden ribbon, but I did not read it. What I did was, I stood up, opened my veil and I was not so sure if I was going to accept the rose, but I did accept it. Then we danced. Then I knew he said something to me, I just couldn’t remember what it is. Then I hugged him and hugged him. Then the setting changed to the wet market. Still, I kept on hugging him and told him things like how he smelled so great and how good it feels to hug him. Then I hugged his back, and kissed his arm.The guy in my dream is not a real person at all because in my dream I never saw a clear vision of his face only his feet and arms.

Then lets continue the dream, Math Nazine came, she’s my friend. We told her about what had happened between us. Marianne(the Ms. Silliman beauty queen) was in the dream, I just don’t know what her role was. Then my dream ended. I think at the last part of my dream, I wasn't so sure though, if the guy wanted me to stop hugging him.

Though someday, I wish this dream would come true :D